warningdontreadthis:

Graham: …did you write these?
Stephen: No I didn’t! Why?
Graham: It just sounds like something you would write.
Stephen: Well read it.
Graham: Knock knock.
Stephen: Who’s there?
Graham: To.
Stephen: To who?
Graham: To whom, surely. 

(via whitepajamas)

whitepajamas:

[on alcohol]
Alan Davies: Does it affect memory? Because I’m… fairly sure it does. Because on my thirtieth birthday, I got some photos back, after we had this diner, and there were some people with indoor sparklers. And I thought, “When did they have them! I must have gone to the loo, or something, I don’t remember that.” And then the next one was me with a sparkler. And then there was me with two sparklers, me lighting sparklers, really intently, and handing sparklers out… 

(Source: buggerygrips, via okaynoproblem-deactivated201104)

whitepajamas:

Alan Davies: How many grains of sand in the Sahara, d’you reckon? 
Stephen Fry: I lost count. It’s quite a few. I got up to seventeen, and it’s definitely more than that. 

(Source: flushedwithcash, via theslurmfactory)